Flickering

Dad has been gone about a month.  I feel a little lost.  Partly because he's gone and partly because I feel like I should feel more.  It comes and goes.  I recently thought of something while I was reading, and it occurred to me to call him and talk.  Then I remembered he is no longer here and that steamrolled into a three to five minute burst of sadness and crying.  It comes and goes.

I interviewed for a few positions around the twin cities, just teaching jobs that are short term (to the end of the school year) so that I can interview for other jobs that come up full time for the next school year.  The job I want is up north, near my old haunts.  Dad would probably push for it on my behalf just due to it being near the woods and the water.  He knows it is a huge part of me.  He knew.

Fuck.
It comes and it goes.