Discord

I can only assume other people feel it, but it sure seems like the current world is ripe and full of discord.  I feel like it has crept into my being, even as I have tried to keep myself away from it all.  Maybe that is the problem.  By trying to protect myself, I actually fed the beast and made myself more susceptible.
It occurred to me that when I think of the things that I love or miss from my past there are inevitably people that are present in those memories.  And they are present to the degree that they supersede the memory of the place
The best example I can give in this regard is of my cabin in Canada.  I love the area.  I love the smell of the pines and the cedar, the water with its color and sound as it rolls in the bowl that is the basin of that entire watershed, and the chance that I might see a familiar creature from year to year.  But eventually the memories of my parents and siblings, followed by long family friends, become a more important image in association.  I spent some time there the summer my mother got sick.  She and my father did not make the trip that year, and in fact, she never returned.  It altered my perception of that place forever.  I am not sure if that is a good thing.
Maybe it simply is what it is and it is how I deal with it from then on.
But it is now the whole of the world that seems that different, not just that one place, and I have begun to wonder if it is me that has changed so drastically or if it is the world.  Maybe it is a little of both, me going my direction and the world going its own, and that gulf is simply larger than I had previously recognized.
What do I want to be a part of?


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